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The difference between a Leader and a Follower | Keto Mom


Keto Mom here!

Most of the time, somebody's going to call you out on something great that you're doing, because it's making them feel inferior. It's making them feel guilty, because they're not going after their goals. So if you notice you're that crab who's trying to get out of the bucket, if you're the Gorilla that knows how to effectively open up a nut, guess what, you're worth the investment. Go join a box, go join a gym, go find some groups of people, some of you may have to change your profession. Some of you may be called to write that book, some of you may have to go write that song, whatever the case may be, you were created for greatness.


Points to Ponder:


00:38 The new move

00:55 Mimicking

01:36 A story of Gorillas

02:32 By Yourself

02:40 Being in an environment

03:39 Finding a different accountability

04:26 Which type are you

05:16 Crabs in the bucket

05:53 Choose your peer group

06:32 When people pull you down

07:19 Make the Best Decision

08:31 Justifications

09:11 Encouragements


Full Episode Transcript


Good morning, Happy Friday! I have a story for you, Steve did not get to hear this story this morning. So we were learning a move that I'm not the greatest at, but I'm learning how to do better, it's called the "Snatch". So we're learning this new move today, she's teaching me how to do it, and I'm not getting it quite right and it's fine. First of all, good morning, how are you doing, where are you tuning in from? I'm going to tell you a story real quick, I thought it was great.


Try to mimic good examples from others

So our coach Amy was like, "Okay, here's how you do the move". I was doing it, then she'd be across the gym saying "Stephanie do it this way". Then she brought me a different bar, I would try to do it that way. And then all of a sudden, I think the last round, there was a guy standing in front of me and I was like, "Oh, I'll just mimic his move". You know how sometimes it's easier to watch than have somebody tell you it or even practice it. So when I mimicked his move, I got the move, and she was like, "Stephanie, you did it". I was like, "Awesome! I just copied him". And then she said, "Hey, there's a cool story about that. It could be good or bad, it's great to mimic somebody".


So maybe you watch our family online, maybe you mimic what we do. Whether it's getting up in the morning, you're working on creating different habits, may be you mimic the way that we eat, there's lots of different things.


So there's a story of Gorillas, there's like a pack of gorillas. And there was a certain way these bunch of Gorillas over here used to open a nut, and they figured out the best, most effective way to open this nut. Then they took the main Gorilla away from this pack, and they put it over with a new bunch of Gorillas. And they were opening the nut a different way, a harder way, it was taking them longer. And you would think that this Gorilla over here would come over here and show them how to do it right. But he didn't, he actually mimicked the way the group and how they were doing it. And so he went back to the old ways of doing things.


You should always focus on your goals

That's just like people... So how many of you feel like you're doing this all on your own? Maybe you do great at home, or maybe when you're by yourself or you order food, you can do it to the best of your ability to meet your goals. But when you're in an environment, maybe when you're at the office, if you're around friends or family who are not on the same page, do you stand strong for your own health beliefs or do you fall back to this group over here.

"You are like the people that you surround yourself with".

So are you going to fall into the ways of the old Gorillas or are you going to let people defeat you. Or go "Oh it's fine, just eat the donut it's not a big deal", "Oh it's fine, let's go have some extra dessert", "Oh stop it, you can get back on track on Monday".


Or are you going to go "I know what to do, because I've done it Monday through Friday, I'm going to stay in my lane. I can still hang out with some of my friends but if they cause me to get distracted or deterred if they're negative, or if they're not focusing on what I'm focused on..." I hate saying do you want to find new friends, but you might have to truly find different accountability.

That is the reality, "You are like the people you hang out with". If it's one, five, or fifty... "You are which pack you choose to sit with".

So you either are strong and you help them get on track, or remember people will watch you, just because they're trying to shove a donut in your face. Or they're going "Oh that's so dumb", "Oh another diet". Most of the time, somebody's going to call you out on something great that you're doing, because it's making them feel inferior. It's making them feel guilty, because they're not going after their goals. So isn't it interesting how somebody can be on this great path of success and victory and goals and say "Hey, I'm going to take over my health and fitness" and it just blows my mind how somebody can go "Oh that's so dumb", "Oh, another diet", "Oh stop it, come and join me". But you would never walk up to somebody in McDonald's that was eating a double size anything and go "I'm so sorry, that's going to help you become overweight".


Some people are Crabs in the bucket

Would you ever call somebody out on eating the doughnut, grabbing the whole pizza, would you ever just go "Oh, that's gonna really help your heart"...

So most people won't actually give feedback when they know it's hurtful. How many people on the pursuit of a goal, a dream, or whatever that may be, people usually pull him back down, like the crabs in the bucket.

We're going to do one more story and we're going to let you go... "The crabs in the bucket", there's a bucket full of crabs and there was one ambitious crab that just did not want to live in the bucket. It's like the Gorilla that knew how to open up the best stuff. But this crab knew that if he got out of the bucket, that its life would be glorious. It would not see plastic, but it would see the beaches of the world. And the crab knew that, it must have had a snippet or had a dream. And so as the crab would climb up the bucket, it would peak its head out and it would see the ocean. And then the crabs inside would just pull it back down, and then that's what happened with the crabs in the bucket.


So our mentor always taught us this, love your family, choose your peer group, it's so great when you have an amazing family. We are blessed to have an amazing family, but that's not always the case for some people.

So that's why I would say this, "You are worth the investment in yourself". So if you notice you're that crab who's trying to get out of the bucket, if you're the Gorilla that knows how to effectively open up a nut, guess what, you're worth the investment.

Go join a box, go join a gym, go find some groups of people, some of you may have to change your profession. Some of you may be called to write that book, some of you may have to go write that song, whatever the case may be, you were created for greatness. And so I guess, I'm fired up from the girl's story, I would encourage you to pursue that. And if you know this, when people start pulling you down or start justifying your activity or what you're going after, if you're feeling yourself being pulled down...


Choose the people you surround yourself
That's the first key, recognizing that, having the awareness, but then it's going to have to be pushing through that resistance.

Find some new friends, you know what to do, even if the only thing we're talking about is food right now, as many times as people messaged me and they go "I don't know how to eat"... You do know how to eat, you all know, like would you grab a salad or would you grab a full pizza, would you take the buns off the burgers?

It might not be perfect, no situation may be perfect, but you should be able to make the best effective decision in that moment.

For me when I grab the donut or the ribeye, that's a tough one, but I would go for the ribeye, so then don't be surprised if somehow I sneak the donut. I'm just kidding. So here's the deal, if you're going to be the Gorilla and you're in a different environment in the weekends, or you find yourself cheating more... Sometimes people go "Do you ever cheat?" Yes. "Am I perfect?". No. What I'm simply saying is this, most people are here for food... It's not that I don't cheat, there are certain foods that I love, but if I were to post that on my stories, what it might do is cause somebody to be the Gorilla that that goes "You know what? I know I shouldn't eat that because I have 50 pounds of fat loss that I want, but Stephanie did it, so I can eat the pizza". Justifies? Yes, justification. The reality is this, you eat clean 98% of the time, I haven't eaten sugar and it's been since July, the beginning of July. I haven't eaten any dessert, mainly because every time I want it, I'm praying over a country.


Do not mess up Good for Perfect

One more thought, this is so important, you may have identified it. Or you may have been able to, while we're sharing the Gorilla and the crab story, you may know either people or even habits in your own life that you know are destructive towards what you're doing.


My encouragement is learn from that and don't beat yourself up. Know that Today is a new day, and even, it's whatever time it is that you're watching this, if you've already made a mistake this day, guess what, the best is yet to come. So just take the next step, do the next thing and each and every one of you know what that is.

Each and every one of you know what that thing is in your life to make your life just 1% better every day.

Drink more water, make the best decision, go to the daily afternoon workout class. Throw the doughnuts off the desk. Whatever it is, reach out to Stephanie. Yes, I'm here to help. So Happy Friday, have a good day.


We appreciate you all and we'll talk to you soon.



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