"A true friend holds you to a higher standard. A best friend or a true friend tells you the truth. And a wise best friend will include a healthy dose of perspective". ~ Andy Andrews
Hey everybody! Welcome to the Keto Mom page. My name is Stephanie, and we are going through this book called "The Noticer" by Andy Andrews.
He has written some incredible books like "The Travelers Gift", but this book is great and it's going to help you get perspective.
I like to do live videos in the morning to give you something to think about and something to ponder about. I will give you a thought or idea to help you throughout your morning.
My hope is that you can have a different perspective today in an area of your life.
I'm not going to read the entire book to you. This book isn't a checklist book. It's not going to tell you to do this and do that, and then get results.
This book is about perspective as you go throughout your day, to truly help change your heart, and your attitude towards situations, environments, and the people in your life.
This book has a character named "Jones", who has great wisdom. And he finds different people in the chapters to give wisdom to. I actually got the chance to be on Andy Andrew's podcast before, probably sometime last year. He reached out and I got to meet him. We had some great conversations about the Keto world and it was really cool.
Andy Andrews is really a great author and a super great man. I love his book because it's a story from of perspective.
This will help give you perspective in life. To look at the circumstances and environments and people that are around you from a different viewpoint. And probably make you realize why they might be doing this and that.
People really don't know who Jones is, some would say he's an angel. So in this 2nd chapter, Jones took a married couple that was on the verge of divorce. And he gave them perspective to see each other in a different light.
"A true friend holds you to a higher standard. A best friend or a true friend tells you the truth. And a wise best friend will include a healthy dose of perspective".
So the couple was struggling in their marriage, and Jones was helping them see each other from different viewpoints. Why she's doing this, or why he's doing this?
"Oftentimes, people's lives are either in a crisis, coming out of a crisis, or heading into another crisis. I want you to know that things aren't as bad as they seem. Most people just lack perspective".
"Your problem is a matter of perspective".
Jones walked these people through marriage and communication. So out of this chapter, I want you to know 3 things that are super powerful.
3 POWERFUL THOUGHTS...
1. Don't see things worse than they are.
We can often make up stories, and we can put situations in a way that we want to see them. A lack of communication allows us to create a story in our minds. A lack of communication and understanding allows us to put people in certain positions or places, and create thoughts and things that were never meant to be.
You could also say that with your health. When you're choosing to go after goals and to become a better you, you might have people in your life that might not seem supportive, or they might not say that they support you. You might be frustrated because your kids, spouse, best friend, mom, or maybe somebody said something hurtful to you.
Maybe you're looking at yourself worse than you actually are.
I wish I could see all of your circumstances and environments, and I wish I could help you pinpoint some things that you're seeing worse than it actually is, but I can't.
"So just don't see things worse than they are".
It could be in communication with somebody close to you, the environment, or in a situation. We see things worse than they are because of a lack of communication, and you did not collect the facts.
2. Collect The Facts.
If you feel resentment or anger, or you've got that wall up. Don't see things worse than they are, and then it's time for you to collect the facts before you make assumptions.
This means you have to be a good communicator, a person of integrity, and go in without anger, preconceived thoughts, or frustration.
I had this conversation with our daughter this morning, and she was asking about a friend who was in a situation. And so I told her, "Listen, girls, what's so great is you have the opportunity to communicate to that friend and ask why they did what they did, instead of assuming".
"If you don't, then you won't get the answer".
But when you collect the facts, you can message that friend after and tell her you saw this, and you're curious why she did this. Does she understand what she did and the repercussions of that choice?
Our girls are blessed to watch me and my husband coach people and hear a lot of words.
And I'm not saying this because there are our kids, but I think they honestly understand self-development, awareness, and different things that a lot of adults don't understand.
They also have to understand that there are mountains to climb, and challenges to overcome and realize that other teams are not there. So they get to choose to have conversations and that's what I talked to them about. Don't assume that the situation is worse than it is.
So I told my daughter...
I need you to have perspective
I need you to ask good questions
I need you to collect the facts
I need you to figure out what the situation is so that you can help coach and guide that person.
3. Assume Positive Intent
When somebody says something bad, you don't know if they're hurt or what's going on in their environment. When somebody has a look on their face, And I had that happen to me at church last night.
There was a situation and a conversation that I was in, and then I was interrupted. I could have easily gone down the spiral route of "Why was I not invited?", "What am I left out of?", "Why was I interrupted, rude!"...
So with that, I didn't get mad, I didn't get frustrated, I legitimately sat, listened, and then I got to put the pieces in the puzzle together to realize it had nothing to do with me. I did not need to be frustrated, and I did not need to feel like I was left out because it had nothing to do with me.
But isn't it interesting how easy we can go down this spiral of frustration, anger, loneliness, or resentment?
When you're seeing things worse than they are.
You didn't collect the facts.
You didn't assume positive intent.
There might be some things, people, or environments that you have to remove yourself from. But until you collect the facts, have conversations, and ask good questions, you will never know the answer.
Power of Assumption.
If you were to just sit and have some conversations, things can be fixed, tied back together, and we all move on.
Remember, don't see things worse than they are, and collect the facts.
I want you to get good at having conversations. I'm not saying these conversations are easy. This conversation might not be easy, but either you're going to choose to have it and grow, or you're going to allow that relationship to stay the same. Stagnant, still boring, very shallow level relationship.
So you either have the conversation, or you have to be okay with what it is.
I also talked about assuming positive intent". It wasn't done to hurt you. It might not have anything to do with you. Let's just figure it out, and I would encourage you to do the same.
I hope that those three things will help guide you, serve you, and create some thoughts that maybe help fix something in your life today what you have been challenged with.
Now that you have an awareness of those things, you can now have the conversations.
"Do not see this worse than it is"
"I'm going to collect the facts".
"I'm going to assume positive intent"
The book is great, and I would actually encourage you to get it and read it. The stories are incredible, and I will continue tomorrow. So I hope that this served you today. It's what was on my heart, and that's what came to my mind.
My goal is to not only help you with your food choices, the fat loss you want to achieve, and the healthy body that you want.
We can also listen to other mindsets, to help make you a better person. Because in becoming a better you, you can overflow into other people and feel empowered to reach your goals.
But you're choosing better and you'll make better decisions.
It all goes down to the food that you eat, and it all started here. So thank you for tuning in.
You can also check our blog, ketomomsecrets.com. We have a ton of recipes, low carb, and how to get started.
Otherwise, have an incredible day. Reach out with questions. Thank you for tuning in and we'll talk to you soon. Bye!
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