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"I'm done. No more! (5-4-3-2-1), I have to redirect my mind to something happy. To something that I'm thankful for. At the rare time, when I would be worried or afraid I would just go (5-4-3-2-1), and I would direct my mind towards a solution rather than worrying about the problem". ~Mel Robbins
Points To Ponder:
00:12 The Crazy Storm
03:24 We Almost Lost One Of Our Dogs
04:48 We Are Very Thankful
05:13 How To Use The 5 Second Rule
06:30 Break Habits Of Worry
07:00 Your worries and fears
07:51 Three Things I Will Teach You
08:51 The Study On 1,200 Senior Citizens
09:34 Think Of Something Positive
10:42 I Am In Control
11:48 Stop Worrying About Things You Can't Control
12:23 5 Second Rule & Your Mental State
13:04 My Friend Was Struggling
14:13 I'm A Very Directive Person
14:59 You Know What To Do
15:48 Different Environments
17:01 Stop Blaming, Shaming and Justifying
18:08 Moving Forward
Full Episode Transcript:
Good morning! Welcome to the Keto Mom page. My name is Stephanie and I have something to share, if you followed us on Instagram @ketomomsecrets and saw our stories, we had a crazy storm yesterday. And if you normally tune in to our morning mindset, or us going through a book. Then you know that I normally come on a lot earlier... We have electricity, our house is okay and we are thankful that everything is fine. My husband is actually going to walk around in our land to see what the wind did. It was crazy wind, we didn't have any tornadoes, we had very strong winds.
We live in Minnesota and we had the crazy storms. A lot of you have had them too when you had storms last week. We have some friends right now preparing for a hurricane in the Philippines. And so man, isn't the weather crazy? It is not normal. Yesterday was like spring here in Minnesota, and then today it's winter again because it's snowing. It's just weird, and then we had crazy winds last night.
So I'm super late this morning because we stayed up all night. Our house felt like it was getting hit by a train, it was so loud. And then we let the kids sleep in, they all slept on our floor. And the safest place in the house was our closet, so they slept in our closet.
We've had a crazy morning, the dogs getting out, so we were chasing dogs. I thought one of our dogs disappeared in our lake because I couldn't find it. And I did not want to deliver the news to our children that one of our dogs is missing. It has been one of those crazy mornings, but still, we're being super thankful. Our girls are just getting up and if you're new to the page, we've got four daughters, and we homeschool, which is why we can sleep in and have a different day than most people...
Okay! we are going to go through the book, "The 5-Second Rule" by Mel Robbins. If you've been following along at all, we have a shorter section today. The 5-Second Rule gets you through a lot of different things. It can even help you get out of bed. If you don't have the book, I would highly recommend that you get it. If you are just tuning in, awesome! I'll give you a golden nugget to help you throughout your day. I would recommend grabbing the book and reading through it sometime because the stories here are incredible...
All right! Where are you tuning in from? Did anybody else have to go through the winds last night? We live on a lake, it's all open and the wind always comes from the south. Unbelievable! It was crazy loud last night. When we looked outside this morning before our dogs got away, I thought maybe one of them drowned in the lake, but it didn't. But the wind ripped the signs off of all of our trees. We have "NO Trespassing" signs and other different signs all over our property. But the wind ripped the nails off, and we don't even have a lot of branches down, that we know of.
Random things scattered all over the place, it moved all of our outside furniture, which I expected, so we laid it down. But nothing was damaged, just everything scattered. It was a little crazy! We also normally let our dogs out on the deck but we had the gate opened, and we were like, Oh no! So we ran outside to grab the dogs, we actually have enough acreage for them to run everywhere, and my dogs aren't super obedient so they got away. We ran outside, we got all of them except for one. We have four dogs, but we could not find one of the little dogs anywhere. The last place I saw him was when he ran under the deck and he didn't come out of the other side. I don't know if he was running so fast that he hit the frozen water and the waters opened? My husband and I wondered if he got in the water because we just couldn't find him anywhere. Normally we can hear him barking, we live on a dirt road but he wasn't anywhere that we could see.
I told my husband, "We're going to have to go and check. If you see him in the water, are you willing to go into the water?". My husband said, "I'll go into the water". But luckily he ran around, we just kept missing him but we finally found him. I actually thought my kids are going to wake up and be so mad at me because one of their dogs fell into the water and died. But thankfully it didn't, all is fine and our house was not damaged...
And that is why I'm late this morning, so please forgive me. But we are very thankful, I'm thankful that nothing is damaged and our kids can sleep in. We are able to start our day late, and it's still completely fine... Okay! Let's start, we're going to talk about, "How to become the happiest person you know". A lot of it has to do with your mindset. So if you're following along, she tells an incredible story at the beginning.
She used the 5-second rule at the beginning of the book to get out of bed. And then she started implementing it on things like going to the gym, saying no to the doughnut, (5-4-3-2-1) I got to go talk to that person. You can use the 5-second rule in any given situation or circumstance. (5-4-3-2-1) It gives you 5 seconds of courage before you talk yourself out of it... She said, "I started to use the 5-second rule to change more than my physical behavior. I wondered if I could change my thoughts. I had seen the effects that had on other habits, so why not try to break the mental habit of anxiety, panic, and fear. They are patterns that we repeat all of the time, they are called habits."...
So she said if I can use the 5-second rule to get myself out of bed, to put the doughnut down, to turn off the TV, and go workout. Do you think I can use it on my mindset? And I think that's huge. Because how often does your mind just wander, go in panic mode or worry all day? How do we control that?
So she gave us a tool and I naturally already do it. I'll tell you about it in just a second... She said, "I started using the 5-second rule to change the way that my mind worked. I began by using the rule to break habits of worry. As I mastered that skill, I used the rule to control my anxiety and to beat my fears of flying"... That's where it started. She was always afraid to fall. She does this practice at rare times and she'll count (5-4-3-2-1) when she is worrying. Does anybody else ever worry, or are you ever afraid?... She shared a story about her husband. She would see her husband get on the motorcycle. He would be going down the road, and instantly she'll have worries like, "What if he gets in a car accident?", "What happened? He doesn't have his helmet"... Isn't it crazy how fast your mind can make you feel afraid, worried anxious, or sometimes you can't breathe...
And so she said, "I'm done. No more! (5-4-3-2-1), I have to redirect my mind to something happy. To something that I'm thankful for. At the rare time, when I would be worried or afraid I would just go (5-4-3-2-1), and I would direct my mind towards a solution rather than worrying about the problem.
Number one, first, I'm going to teach you how to break the addiction to worry and negative self-talk using the 5-second rule. Second, we'll dive into the subject of anxiety and panic. Third, we'll finally learn a proven strategy and how you can beat any fear.
Using the fear of flying as an example, you'll learn how to use the rule with anchoring thoughts to prevent fear from taking over your mind. We're first going to talk about stop not worrying. More than any other change, ending your habit of worrying will create the single, biggest positive impact in your life. Believe it or not, you were taught to worry as a kid. "Be careful", your parents would say. "Wear a hat or you'll get cold", "Don't sit too close to the TV"... As adults, we spend so much time and energy worrying about things that we can't control, or that could go wrong. When we get to the end of our life, we'll wish we hadn't worried"...
She said there was a study that was done, and they talked to one thousand two hundred senior citizens and discussed the meaning of life... And the majority of them said, "I wish I hadn't spent so much of my life worrying".
She said, this is what we're going to do about (5-second rule), "It will teach you how worrying, as a default setting, that in your mind goes to when you're not paying attention. The key to catching yourself when you drift into worry or fear is regaining mental control by using the 5-second rule. As soon as you catch yourself worrying you go, (5-4-3-2-1), and I would think of something positive. Instead of worrying about my husband going down the road on his motorcycle and thinking of him getting in a car accident. I would think of him smiling as he drove down the road"...
She would tell herself this, "Oh! no, you don't" So every time she would catch herself worrying, being afraid, or having any negative thought, she immediately counts (5-4-3-2-1)...
Does anybody have any negative thoughts throughout the day? Me, I have four daughters and I have to constantly worry if my girls are not with me. Or I think of just crazy things happening in the world, even the tornadoes last night, we all saw what happened in Kentucky, right? We're praying for those families. We saw the houses and I think it's almost up to a hundred people possibly killed by the tornadoes. And then we get the news that the weather is coming our way...
How crazy is it that your mindset can worry all day long? You're in fear and panic mode. You can go down this rabbit hole, it can control your day or even your life. So I kept telling myself, "Nope! I'm in control of my mind"...
I've been doing this for a long time, and it's a habit you have to create. So as soon as I panic and worry, or something isn't right? I legitimately close my eyes, by the way, this is just me and not everybody does this. But as soon as I have a bad thought in my mind or something that's not right, I honestly will say, Jesus! Jesus! Jesus!... And then I shift my thought into something positive.
I've done it for a long time, and I catch myself doing it a lot. Whatever works for you, or you can just count backward, (5-4-3-2-1). Look at something, and then shift your mindset. I can't control what's going on, so I'm going to either find a solution or change what I'm thinking about. Everybody manages it or thinks of things differently. But it works! There's no reason for you to live your day and your life, worrying about things that you can't control at all...
She said the 5-second rule can be used to help with your mindset. If you can control your mind, your worries, thoughts, and even your self-talk. You're going to have a better day, you're going to choose differently, you're going to go down a different path. It's super important!...
Alright! We're going to stop there because she kept talking about worries and fears. And it is quite long, I'll go into that tomorrow... But the 5-second rule not only can physically help you, but it can also help you with your mental state. Continue to tune in because I think it's super powerful for your mindset. Your goals for your health, the fat loss that you want, weight loss, the way you want to look, and the way you want to feel. It starts with your mindset. It's how you think about yourself and others. It's the things you worry about or don't worry about. It's not being anxious or panicky or thinking that you can't do it, your self-doubt... I had a friend reach out to me yesterday, and she was struggling.
She talked about her finances and about the way that she was feeling. I know her very well, we have been talking for over a year and I asked her, "What did you stop doing recently that you were doing before? Are you reading?" and she said, "No, I'm not doing any of the things that I was doing in the mornings anymore"...
Listen, I've been through all of these different moments. Like, here's how you should speak, here's how you should present. I know how to tell good stories, how to say something positive, give direct action, and then cup it with something positive. Like I know all of these ways that you can make things appear nicer. But then the true me wants to get right into the solution. I don't always say something positive, redirect the thought and then say something positive. I would probably say, "You know what to do. Here's your action step"...
I know I need to work on slowing down, but I'm very much a directive person. So if you're like, "I don't like this". Then most likely, I'm going to tell you, "Here's how you change it". That's just me and my husband always says I'm very direct. I know! But in this world full of glorious rainbows and butterflies, sometimes, people need a direct answer... So what I said to her was, "You know what to do. Tomorrow morning, get up, read and do the things that you've been doing before this happened"... Oftentimes, we go down that spiral. It's the same thing with eating. You know what to do. You know shouldn't eat that doughnut, you should make better choices, pack your lunch, or go to the gym. You already know all of these things, but how do we keep doing them?
By reading, raising your level of awareness, and taking care of your mindset. Get up earlier, and stop self-doubting. Put little notes around your mirror, put post-it notes around your house telling yourself how great you are. Find an accountability partner, find a group to plug into, and listen to something. You just have to stop the bad habits. It's straight-line discipline, and you have to want it...
I get it! There are different environments that people grew up in. There are people that have been severely abused growing up. I understand! My girls sometimes ask me, "How do people get so large?" or "How do they get so unhealthy?".
And I often tell them, "Listen! You have grown up in a home that is full of love, encouragement, with Jesus and parents that care about you. Parents that read to you, and we understand the mindset. So we're teaching you all of these things... But a majority of the reason why people are the way they are today has to do with how they were raised. It could be emotional abuse or physical abuse. And a lot of people in the past have turned to food for a reward or as comfort. Therefore you have to help adults retrain their minds so they can feel worthy, and worth it"... How do you do that? You get books into their hands, counseling, finding groups to encourage them, and not to have a pity party.
Eventually, there has to be a line drawn into the sand. There's no more blaming, shaming, and justifying, but you have to get out of those bad habits to get to where you want to go. Like, "I feel bad enough, so I want to change", "I found a group of people that I trust", "I have to put the past in the past and I'm going forward"... There are many of you that have to work through things, I promise you that I truly understand. I know it's not just, "Okay! I can change my mindset in 5-4-3-2-1". There are things that people have to work through. And then there is a point where you have to draw a line in the sand.
Whatever happened in the past, you're going to have to use the 5-second rule. Tell yourself, "I am not my past", "I am not the people in my past", "I don't have that environment anymore", "I'm going to have to buck up", and "I'm going to have to change this or else, I'm going to pass it on to my children"...
You might not see the results that you want, but it all starts with your mindset. (5-4-3-2-1) You can start by reading, acknowledging the fact of what you went through, and just being done. You're moving forward. Control your mind and use tools to help you as you go. That doesn't mean you won't have a bad day, but getting out of that bad day will become faster. You won't use food as a reward or as a comfort. You'll go for a walk, sit down, do a little bit of quiet time, or go find a book to read. You might have triggers, but then you're going to go find something else besides food, to comfort you. I'm saying that because we're on a page where a majority of people use food as a reward, as a comfort, or as emotional-support...
So with all of that, please continue to tune into the page. I am here to help you, just send me messages. Today in my stories, I've been getting a lot of questions about other books that would be great gifts. When I'm done feeding our girls, and when I get them started on their homeschool, I will go post it on my stories so you can just watch the stories. I will pull out all of the books that I think are great gifts and the books that I love. You can take screenshots of them and maybe someday, read them too. Alright! I hope you guys have a great day. I am always here to help and I appreciate you all. We'll talk to you very soon!
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